Arrested Development


images-1Comedy Central’s cult classic Workaholics has given us myriad memorable, moments, hilarious lines, and awkward predicaments, that it seems only the dream team trio of Blake (Blake Anderson, above, l.), Ders (Anders Holm), and our favorite, Adam (Adam Devine, above, r.) can get into and out of, or just into.  To recall a few:  The time, when, to avoid an overzealous security agent, our trio took to the sewers.  The result?  Well, um, shit.  The very, very classic episode called “Muscle I’d Like to Flex” when Laura Kightlinger guests as Sharon Lavarno, the cougar who owns the building where our boys ‘te-lemarket’, and whose gaze lands upon the inimitable Adam DeMamp, while he pumps iron on the roof of the building.  That episode begins with a clip from the beginning of the group’s Wizard Rap (“Wizards Don’t Die”), which we’ve cued for you below from a live set in which the full song appears, and where the sound quality is markedly better than the Youtube show clips.  Take a look:

That episode also gave us the following gem:

“Did you ever meet someone who like gets you on all levels?  Makes you feel like your souls are boning each other in the spirit world?”

Of course, the gem belongs to Adam, who, frankly, has had so many of them that we may reconsider our recent stance that Rafi (Jason Mantzoukas) of “The League” is the funniest character on television.

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So so many.  On the death of “Homegirl”:

“Brain tumor.  Doctor said it was the size of a p’zone.”

On Anders’ remarks on the taste of spermicide:

“I can’t believe you know what spermicide tastes like.  Have you been deep throating condoms just because you can?”

On his disbelief that Ipecac will make him yack upon drinking some, because Ipecac is a scientific formula:

“Those scientists better check their hypotenuses, dude.”

Then he of course pukes, post haste.  On historical figures:

“Shakespeare was a super important dude.  He was like the president of Rome.”

Not only do we look forward to Adam Devine reprising the Adam DeMamp role, we also look forward to his role in the much anticipated return (to Netflix) of Arrested Development, S4.

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Another favorite of ours is “To Friend a Predator”, when the boys set in motion a ruse to lure and catch “Topher” (Chris D’Elia), who has revealed himself as a pedophile, and connoisseur of boys aged “10 to 12.”  Only apprehending Topher becomes more difficult than planned because Topher is the coolest, rather, the “ballingest” guy they’ve ever met, arriving to the trap they’ve set for him at their Rancha Cucamunga, well, um, ranch, armed with a bag of herb and a spud gun to launch projectile potatoes.

Topher ends up taking the boys to Club Damnation, a club that they normally aren’t cool enough to gain entry to.  The boys are out of place but ecstatic nonetheless, despite their less than chic fashion sense being described as “90’s Canadian.”  And all the more ecstatic when Topher introduces them to three female model friends who live in “The Penthouse Penthouse”, a clever takeoff on The Playboy Mansion.  When one of the ladies takes Adam’s phone and enters what is presumably her number, Adam endeavors to dial it.  When Adam sees it is actually ringing, prompting the realization that she had in fact given him her real number, a bewildered Adam declares, “there really is a second time for everything.”

The boys also displayed a bit of a social conscience when they go all “21 Jump Street”, undercover style, at the local high school, to foil neighborhood vandals.  A truly priceless scene comes when Adam, who has gotten in with the cool kids, forces a “swirlie” on Blake when they catch him acting weird in the bathroom, because Blake has not gotten in with the cool kids.  The swirlie.  Long may it live.

Our boys also have time for fun, even in “Business Trip”, when Adam, Blake, and Karl, their friend and homeless drug dealer (Kyle Newacheck, who happens to write much of this brilliant comedy, along with the 3 stars, and who happened to direct the episode), crash Anders’ hotel room when he leaves to close an important client and skips out on their plans to do LSD together.

Adam on when his friend took LSD:

“My buddy did acid once, and he could immediately speak Cantonese.  He was like, “sooong ting taoooo!”

While the boys never actually realized their dream of getting to The Penthouse Penthouse, we’re hoping that that storyline gets revisited sometime during S4, which is set to debut in about 4 weeks time.  Perhaps they will work in more rapping as well, as the boys are the most talented comedic rapping team this side of The Rhymnoceros and The Hip Hop Opotamus, the alter egos of Brett and Jemaine, from an even greater classic, “The Flight of the Choncords”.

And on that note, a word to our recent “fans’ and their “comments”–both loosely termed.  Be more constructive with your feedback please.

Crack (https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com)

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2011/03/09/steve-carrell-out-of-the-office-not-funny-but-replacement-will-be/

Yeah that was us a few months back, telling you not to worry about The Office, that their superior writers would make magic out of Steve Carrell’s departure, and that it was Carrell, whose movies largely suck, who we didn’t think was particularly funny except when Michael Scott.  Will Ferrell, a titan of comedy, as the temporary replacement, Deangelo Vickers, was not Michael, but he is a big name and a comedic genius probably of greater stature than Steve Carrell and he could’ve pulled it off.

We don’t know that any of the candidates we were subject to seeing interview last night were capable of pulling off running Dunder Mifflin’s Scranton branch with the possible exception of James Spader, who we don’t naturally love, but we have to admit that he did interview more dynamically than the others, and was probably the most quirky and unpredictable.  We are definitely not impressed with the process so far, nor are we impressed at all with the apple of show management’s eye, Catherine Tate (above), who we are reading everywhere is in the lead for the role as of right now.

While we waited with baited breath for Danny McBride to sweep into the conference room–something we thought we were assured of and was confirmed–a very weak bunch paraded in instead, and we thought them weak in every sense.  We weren’t thrilled with Will Arnett over a Danny McBride or Rhys Darby, but we still thought he’d do fine.  Well, last night’s Office couldn’t even manage to give Arnett any funny lines, or that extravagant flair he displays as Devin Banks on 30 Rock and of course, as GOB on Arrested Development.  And where in the hell was McBride?  Very upsetting.

Ray Romano?  We love him and written well, the role would be a piece of cake for him.  But like everyone else, he was flat and watching him was a struggle.  Warren Buffett?  Sure it’s a gag, but do they really have time to waste on non serious candidates in the season finale?  They advertise Jim Carrey all week as a candidate and then bring him in as an after thought at minute 58?

And why is Paul Lieberstein so skinny?  Do you guys know that is health status was one of the most frequently queried Google searches in the last 12 hours?  Farbeit from us to speculate on what could be an unfortunate situation for Lieberstein, but he looked like a skeleton, and he has missed a lot of time in the last few years, giving way to Amy Ryan’s Holly Flax.

As for Ricky Gervais, could this guy go away already?  We get it, we get it.  He’s the original David Brent, and as such, has clawed out a de facto EP position on The Office, but this guy should spend more time working on his own projects, which aren’t very funny.  How many shows will HBO hand the man, and when will one of them make us laugh?

It used to be that if HBO gave you a foreigner, it was appointment television.  Then there’s the Ricky Gervais exception.  Can there be any doubt that he isn’t pushing for Catherine Tate, of Dr. Who “fame”?  And what about The Office producers interview with our favorite band manager, Rhys Darby, who played Murray Hewitt hilariously on Flight of the Conchords?  We subsequently read that The Office wasn’t interested in Darby after meeting with him, and failed to grant him the courtesy of any sort of call back.

Bad form!  We’re very disappointed.  We’ll hold out hope that it isn’t Tate, and we’ll give her a chance to change our minds if it is her.  Who knows?  She very well may, but from where we sit, this is not the female John Cleese by any stretch.

If it’s not too late to offer suggestions for new blood, we may as well give it a try.  We thought Thomas Lennon of Reno 911 (Lt. Dangle) was an excellent, quirky boss of funny, oddball types, and we loved the short shorts.  After seeing Catherine Tate tell the cameras she thought she was Jo’s best friend, we also felt a desperate need to push a last ditch campaign for another excellent comedic actor, Bob Odenkirk, who is phenomenal, and always insanely good in a well done show and fine cast.

Crack (https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com, www.crackbillionair.com)

Evan Almighty.  Date Night.  Dinner for Schmucks.  We’ve got no problem saying this: The Office, a superior outift with exceptional writers made Michael Scott, not the reverse.  The tired Seth Rogan/Paul Rudd movie factory may have given us 1 good Carrell film–The 40 Year Old Virgin–but little to nothing else with Carrell worth watching.  Most of the reaction we’ve heard with regard to Carrell leaving The Office has been pessimistic pertaining to the future of the show.  We, on the other hand, have no doubts that The Office can function without Michael Scott.

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We think Steve Carrell is crazy to leave The Office, which will undoubtedly be the absolute best product he has ever worked on.  We think it’s a poor decision to abandon his $300,000 per episode salary.  And we are extremely confident that the show, which has perhaps needed a shot of enthusiasm for a few seasons (not for lack of trying with the guest addition of Timothy Olyphant and Amy Ryan’s role reprisal of Holly Flax), can be an excellent and dynamic program and can return to the top of network sitcom television.  The Office can even reach new heights if they follow through on their plans to replace Michael Scott’s character with someone from outside the show.  While we love Jim, Dwight, and Andy, none do anything for us in the lead role.

The late summer talk about The Office producers contacting Flight of the Conchords alum Rhys Darby (top) and Eastbound and Down star Danny McBride (bottom), and to a lesser extent, recent rumors about Arrested Development star Will Arnett (middle) have our full attention.  McBride has seemed to generate the most excitement and buzz so far.  Frankly, he is absolutely hilarious as crass, washed up pitcher Kenny Powers, and has one of the funniest hairstyles of all time.  From what we’re reading though, at least out of HBO, is that McBride is unlikely to get the gig.  Producer Paul Lieberstein (Toby) recently denied that McBride was in the running, but it was confirmed that McBride would be doing a guest spot this season.  HBO has been less coy than Lieberstein, saying that McBride is signed up long term to do Kenny Powers, is paid very well, and went so far as to suggest that McBride would have no interest in joining the cast of The Office.

The cable network issued no similar statements with regard to Darby, leading us to believe that something is cooking.  We would emphatically endorse the hire.  Darby, as Brett and Jemaine’s band mannager on Flight of the Conchords was exponentially quirky in a way very reminiscent to the Michael Scott character, only with a New Zealand accent and the added awkwardness of a tourist with less than zero street smarts.  Darby, like Carrell, has even demonstrated his proficiency with the occasional musical number.  Darby’s low profile in America and immense respect in comedic circles would be a win win for a program in need of new talent and a network looking to make a reasonable deal with an actor.

The wildly popular and recognizable McBride would not come cheaply and without obstacles, or at least, that’s what HBO wants us to think.  And we have questions about how well McBride will do without the luxury of of his hysterical foul mouth rants and drug humor, which is not about to play on NBC.  He’d be unwise to leave the role of a lifetime on Eastbound and Down for the huge pressure associated with filling Michael Scott’s shoes.

Recently several Arrested Development actors have been mentioned for the job, including the legendary Jeffrey Tambor, Tony Hale, and most notably, Will Arnett, who Ricky Gervais has been publicly pining for.  We love Tambor.  “Hey Now” Hank Kingsley?  Classic.  George Bluth Sr?  JT played that role to a tee.  And we look forward to his frequent cameos as himself on Entourage, the long term client of Ari Gold (Jeremy Piven, another Larry Sanders Show alum).  Tambor isn’t really new blood to us though.  Hale is not a heavy enough hitter, and Arnett, though we love him across the board and loved his GOB character to death, we have way more enthusiasm for Rhys Darby, who we feel is the perfect fit.

Though we will not be surprised if Arnett gets the nod, having done a guest shot on his wife Amy Poehler’s very funny NBC sitcom Parks and Recreation, and having played a corporate foil to Alec Baldwin’s Jack Donaghy for 3 years on NBC’s 30 Rock.  Can Arnett jump to a 3rd Thursday night NBC sitcom?  No doubt he could.  But how about Ricky Gervais shuts the fuck up so that BJ Novak (Ryan), Lieberstein, and Mindy Kaling (Kelly), all Office producers, can go with their gut and bring in Darby?

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Can you tell that we are really hoping for an Office dick meeting?  Wait…that sounds bad.  Just a Murray Hewitt/Flight of the Conchords reference!

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/03/15/hbo-takes-flight/

Crack (https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com, www.crackbillionair.com)