Ben Roethlisberger

We’ll be real right now, as we are wont to do.  We don’t despise Green Bay more than any other team that’s not a divisional opponent of the Jets, and nowhere near as much as Dallas, Oakland, Pittsburgh, Denver, Indy, or Washington.  Or Philadelphia, naturally.  We loved the whole Lombardi thing.  Books, documentaries, whatever.  (Brooklyn holler!)  We don’t wish to be too venomous in this space on this topic, so be advised that the opinion we are expressing is not meant to heap fresh scorn on Joe Philbin, Green Bay’s Offensive Coordinator, and it’s not like he’s sitting around reading us anyway.

But as we like to say, we have the right to say it, so we’re saying it.  It’s hard for us to mourn a kid who rapes little girls.  Frankly, we aren’t about to do it.  Nor can we mourn for a family that created an environment in which little girls get passed out drunk and then are sexually assaulted in the bed where the head of the household sleeps.  Yup.  Meet the Philbins, America.  Meet good old minor raping family USA and then figure out what is the proper way in which to regard them.

Was Michael Philbin Ben Roethlisberger Jr?  Yes, more or less.  Less the arm, more the convictions.  But here we have a football coach neglectful of his family, bordering on criminally so, and another football brat, bent on criminal sexual deviance.  Organized and calculated criminal sexual deviance.

We can’t say we read the Green Bay newspapers.  We aren’t one of the 10,000, so we didn’t know until the other day that this kid was a sex offender.  And don’t throw semantics at us.  That the judge for some reason didn’t make the kid register as a sex offender says more about the kid’s patrician status as the son of a Packer coach than it does about the truth.

Also, this wasn’t an isolated offense.  Two rapes, two sixteen year olds, two sentences.  This kid was a serial rapist.  As the families of the victims expressed, the class of the crime (misdemeanor) did not adequately portray the seriousness of the offenses.  Really, a little pedophilia is only tolerable in the fictional worlds spun by Tom Robbins, and otherwise, is no laughing matter.

When we heard that the Philbin kid was fished out of that lake cold, we assumed it was another dysfunctional football family, good from far, far from good, religious but not moral, and that an attention deprived kid took his life.

We could have a little bit of sympathy for that.  But not for a victim-ful crime family.  No understanding either.  Sex criminals and child abusers may get opportunities to rehabilitate themselves, but do they really, and really, who even cares anyway?  Would we have trusted our daughters around this kid because he had spent 4.5 months in jail?

Absolutely not.  And we can not trust his father either.  Again, we think only his patrician status stood between him and some sort of charge that he had endangered the welfare of a minor, what with the wild liquor and rape party going down in his home, the rapes between his sheets.

What of the tears shed by the Philbins at their son’s sentencing?  Tears of guilt?  Regret?  Contrition?  Responsibility?  Or of shame for their “good name”?  Or because their lad was off to the pen?

Spoke to Mr. White this morning.  He’s a Dolphin fan.  He said he was hoping Philbin became his next head coach.  Why not?  He’s obviously a very good football coach.  That really was never the problem.

Crack (

ESPN reported earlier today that Ben Roethlisberger came out against the NFL’s announcement this week that hits to the head would be punished to the letter of the rules, and will include big fines as well as suspensions.  Supposedly Big Bad Ben and backup Byron Leftwich had a meeting of the minds and came up with the theory that they’d rather have the concussion than a more serious injury somewhere else.

But we know the real reason, right?  Because Roethlisberger doesn’t use his brain anyway.  He thinks with his dick.

Crack (,

Braylon Edwards in green and white (above).

New York Jets’ star receiver Braylon Edwards, acquired in a trade with Cleveland last year, was arrested on Monday morning in New York City after blowing a .16 on a breathalyzer exam.  

New York Jets star wide receiver Braylon Edwards told a police officer he’d been partying and drinking before being pulled over in his luxury SUV, but he suggested letting him leave the car and go home, prosecutors said as he was arraigned Tuesday on drunken-driving charges.A solemn Edwards was released without bail in a case that could compound his legal troubles while he’s on probation after a fracas in Cleveland last year. He declined to discuss the drunken-driving arrest as he left a Manhattan courthouse, thronged by reporters.

Defense lawyer Peter M. Frankel said Edwards was exhausted and focused on getting back to his team.

“Obviously, this is very difficult for him,” Frankel said. “Without question, absolutely, he understands the seriousness of the situation, and he is committed to getting back on the football field and doing what he does best for the Jets.”

A breath test showed Edwards had a blood-alcohol level twice the legal limit after he was stopped on Manhattan’s West Side around 5 a.m. Tuesday, prosecutors said. Chief police spokesman Paul Browne said officers on the lookout for such violations as overly tinted windows stopped Edwards because his Land Rover’s windows were too dark and then noticed a strong smell of alcohol.

Luckily for Edwards and the Jets, the team is willing to facilitate Edwards’ weary man wishes.  Jets’ brass, consisting of Woody Johnson, Mike Tannenbaum, and Rex Ryan said earlier tonight that Edwards, who the Jets will need on Sunday night, will dress but not start on Sunday, and will see game action at some point.

Thank God.  No one said he wasn’t a complete fool and a reckless criminal.  That’s not why he’s here.  He’s here to play football.  He punched Lebron James’ friend?  Very odd.  But here we are, discussing the wrongs of an NFL player, of all things.  Take his license away.  But he does have to play in Miami Sunday night.  He isn’t here for the Jets to discipline him, though it would seem warranted, especially after two stupid taunting instances on Sunday in the end zone, and one unsportsmanlike conduct penalty.

It’s a judge’s job to punish the man.  And when that judge adjudicates the matter, I will stand with whatever Goodell’s suspension for Edwards is.  But not until then.


Crack (,

Vikings’ head coach Brad Childress shakes hands with Brett Favre (above).

According to ESPNEWS and, several Vikings’ players have told sources that Brett Favre waivered so much about his latest comeback because he “doesn’t trust Childress” and because Favre thinks that the coach “doesn’t know anything about offense.”

The back story on Brett Favre and his return to the Minnesota Vikings — and you knew there would be a back story — is that Vikings players are losing respect for their coach, Brad Childress.

To no one’s surprise, Favre is one of these players.

“Brett thinks Childress has no clue about offense,” a Vikings player told Yahoo’s Jason Cole.

Multiple players echoed that, according to Cole’s report, and the issue was a bigger factor in Favre’s decision to play this fall than his gimpy ankle.

“Brett just doesn’t trust him,” a player said.

In early July, Favre indicated to a teammate that he was likely to play, but, after a Childress visit to Favre’s home in Hattiesburg, Miss., on July 19, Favre began to reconsider. After a visit from teammates Steve Hutchinson, Jared Allen and Ryan Longwell earlier this week, Favre decided to return for his second season with Childress in Minnesota.

Is anyone surprised?

I mean, a standup guy like Brett Favre, recently marred by the flap over him texting a picture of his penis to former Jets’ sideline reporter Jenn Sterger, trying to get his head coach fired after just announcing his comeback this week?

Sounds about right for super hick, Brett Favre, the one time vicodin addicted good old boy who blasts country music in the locker room, who allows his cotract negotiations to be handled by a guy named “Bus” (Favre agent Bus Cook), and who we recently learned is a pervert and could-be sex offender.

Favre pulled this whole routine, basically to the letter, when he was here with the Jets, and frankly, I think any Jets fan would readily tell you they were very happy to part ways with him.  The first stage of Favre makes you happy, because you wouldn’t have him if he wasn’t an upgrade.  But when things start going wrong, he takes on more responsibility–he’s notorious for changing play calls at the line of scrimmage, but then looks to blame others, like his coaches.  I could see why he didn’t like Mangini–Mangini was against making the move to acquire him.  But for Favre to expect us to believe that he would have been fine with ceding his starting role to Kellen Clemens when his arm was hurting in 08, but that Mangini essentially ordered him to play is ridiculous.  Favre has started a million consecutive games.  That’s because he wants to play.  Favre took painkillers so that he could play. 

Then, even as Favre threw pick after pick that killed the Jets down the stretch in 08, the Jets’ management, desperate for a marquis quarterback, fired Mangini in the hopes of retaining Favre, despite the 3 ring circus he leads.  Here was the Jets’ reasoning with regard to Mangini: we either have to give him a new contract because he’d be a lame duck otherwise, or fire him, and since he lost the last 5 games and started 7-3 and failed to make the playoffs, firing him makes more sense. 

By then, a lot of players had come out in opposition to Mangini, and we heard whispers that Woody Johnson himself was miffed at how little emotion Mangini showed on the sideline and in meetings.  While Mangini left a lot to be desired, he was the most successful coach in Jets’ history, believe it or not.  Also, we hear that he was downright verbally abusive to players, which doesn’t sound like a guy who never becomes animated.  Ryan seems to be a better fit for the Jets, and it is very nice to have the number one defense, which Ryan and Pettine have engineered.  But firing Mangini was also going to make them more attractive to Favre, they were hoping, when faced with having a weak Kellen Clemens as your alternative.

Childress brought Favre in, and he will have to live, and probably will die with a guy who conducts his own separate training camp at a high school in Hattiesburg.

–Crack (,

Model and reporter, Jenn Sterger (above).

We’ve got a good one for you.  Brett Favre, the on again, off again NFL legend, made unwanted sexual advances to then Jets’ sideline reporter Jenn Sterger while a Jet in 2008, according to off the record conversations in which Sterger revealed the news to Deadspin editor A.J. Faulerio.  Sterger revealed that the sexual harrassment included a picture text message of Brett Favre’s “dick.”

The controversy dates back to just before the Super Bowl, when Sterger, currently a reporter on Versus’ “The Daily Line,” told Daulerio that Favre had sent her flirty voicemails and naughty pictures in 2008, when she was working for the Jets as a sideline reporter and Favre was Gang Green’s quarterback.

Daulerio said Sterger, 26, told him that she had received several friendly but strange voicemail messages early in the 2008 season.

“But then, one night, Sterger received a picture on her phone which was so shocking that she just tossed it across the room. It was his d—. Brett Favre’s d—.”

Daulerio reported that Sterger, who has posed for steamy photos for Maxim and Playboy, was not interested in a sexual relationship with Favre because she didn’t think it would be a good idea to have an affair with the Jets’ biggest star.

Wow.  I guess the penis show move is a go to for a lot of NFL quarterbacks.

Favre recently announced he was retiring from football, but we are sure he only feels that way because he doesn’t want to attend training camp.  We’d bet he’d be back on the field and showing his penis regularly to sideline reporters next season, and probably beyond.

–Crack (,

“Role model” Ben Roethlisberger fondling a bottle of liquor at a house party (above).

Isn’t everything wonderful in the world for Big Ben Roethlisberger?  On Friday, the star quarterback and erstwhile pervert/rapist told the media about all of his apprehensions surrounding his return to the field.

Roethlisberger told the Post-Gazette’s Ed Bouchette Friday that he was “scared” about the fan reaction he might receive at Saturday’s afternoon practice, the first open to Steelers Nation. Perhaps during his ride to camp up Route 30 he had seen the sign outside of a Latrobe business that was directed at him and Steelers president Art Rooney II, who made the decision not to trade or release Roethlisberger after his deplorable escapades in March in Milledgeville, Ga.
Roethlisberger memorably had sex with a 20 year old coed in March who did not consent to sex, while his off duty police officer bodyguards kept the girl’s friends separated from the girl while Roethlisberger forced himself on the girl in a townie bar bathroom.  In the aftermath, we learned that Roethlisberger, on several occasions, took his penis out in public and showed it to college girls, which we presumed at the time, was his go to pickup move.  We also learned about a story in which a Pittsburgh man put a gun to Roethlisberger’s head outside a Pittsburgh bar because the quarterback had tried to put a move on the man’s girlfriend, and that since then, Roethlisberger always goes out with bodyguards.  You can read about those incidents at the links below:

But the idiots who rolled out to Steelers’ practice yesterday gave Roethlisberger a hero’s welcome, despite knowing what he is.  Are they some good Christians over there, or what?

Did I mention the fans — young fans, older fans, female fans, male fans — surged to get close to Roethlisberger?

The snow fence in front of the bleachers at Chuck Noll Field where he started to sign was pushed down and nearly destroyed.

“I think it went well,” Roethlisberger said. “The fans were warm and loving. That’s how I knew they would be — or hoped they would be.”

There even was a topper to Big Ben’s day.

“I think I completed every pass.”

Don’t underestimate the significance there.

Winning back the fans at training camp was easy for Roethlisberger. Every summer, they prove how loyal they are to the Steelers and their players — all of their players — by fighting the traffic to get to Latrobe and watch practice, not so much because they love football, but because they want to be close to their team’s heroes.

Wow.  Pittsburgh gets more impressive by the second, no?  As legend has it, the crowd went wild when Big Ben autographed one of his dirty cleets and gave it to a little boy who was getting pushed around on the autograph line (below).  What a great guy!

Roethlisberger should be awaiting a felony sexual assault trial, but instead his biggest care in the world is whether the Steeler fans boo him at practice.  Isn’t the world a great place?  It is when you are an NFL player. Especially in Pittsburgh.  Too bad you have to live there.

–Crack (

Disgraced alleged rapist and NFL star, Ben Roethlisberger (above), sporting his favorite t-shirt.

You know what?  I’m pretty much talked out on this one.  Ben Roethlisberger is unredeemable, as I see it, as a man who has a young daughter who will go to college some day.  The news we are about to relay further disgusts us, but does not surprise us, because once we heard that Roethlisberger liked to take his dick out in public, and in fact, that it was a sort of “go to” play for him in the bar scene, we had a prison jumper fitted for him and ready to go.  Probably even before that.

His accuser, a 20-year-old college student, told police in a March interview that she believed the star quarterback and his bodyguards schemed to bring her into a secluded part of a nightclub before exposing himself to her in a bathroom in the early hours of March 5.

“It was just so scary because it like happened so fast with the bodyguard escorting me,” she said, wearing a navy blue T-shirt and her blond hair pulled back. “It was kinda like they had planned it.”

The video of her second interview with police was released by the Georgia Bureau of Investigation along with more than 50 audio and video recordings Wednesday morning.

I don’t know about you guys, but the way I’m keeping score, I have Roethlisberger down as a flasher who is also a premeditated rapist, among other not nice things.  Can the victim hire Gloria Allred already, and take this guy’s every last dime in a civil suit?

–Crack (

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