Miami Dolphins


Jets Stadium TourWoody Johnson (above), who should make that helmet a permanent component of his wardrobe.

There is no dysfunction quite like that Jet dysfunction.  There are no shit rosters quite like Jet shit rosters (anyone besides myself recall a wide receiver tandem of the little engine that could, Wayne Chrebet, and Arena football player Kevin Swayne?).  There are no blown second rounders like Jet blown second rounders (Browning Nagle, Mike Nugent, Vlad Ducasse, etc.).  Don’t even talk about the 1st round, where the Jets passed on Warren Sapp and once drafted Bryan Thomas over sure Hall of Famer Ed Reed.  But understand this: former owner Leon Hess, while not a football man, was an excellent businessman, was kind and benevolent, and oversaw the drafting of the team’s only franchise quarterback, Joe Namath, in its now 50+ year history, and subsequently, the Jets only Superbowl victory, the historic first ever Superbowl win for the American Football League, which helped force the merger that led to the formation of the NFL.

Did he make mistakes?  Too many to count.  Rich Kotite, anyone?  But Hess also hired Big Bill who led the organization to its most successful decade, sans the Superbowl, in its history.  Mr. Hess, which we call him out of respect, an earned title, was a self made man with courage and character, who, to carve out an empire in oil, had to negotiate with a gun barrel to his nose, and who cared so much for his employees that when Dennis Byrd was paralyzed during play, Hess paid out the rest of Byrd’s contract in full, immediately, and took an enormous personal interest in Byrd’s recovery.  Mr. Hess ensured Byrd would receive the very best medical care, essentially bequeathed him his personal aircraft, and sat with Byrd in the hospital every day for a year.

Once when asked of it, a candid Hess told a reporter that if he knew that a player could get injured so seriously in football, he “would have never bought the team.”  Upon Byrd’s recovery, at the press conference when he was released from the hospital, the former player uttered that most famous line, probably the most pride inspiring line associated with the Jets in all history, when he said, “I came to New York from Oklahoma a young Christian man.  Today I return to Oklahoma a young Christian man and a New York Jet.”

The current owner, Woody Johnson, who gets no respectful moniker from us, should not be viewed by anyone, most especially himself, through the illusory prism that wealth and power equate to success.  Johnson & Johnson had made billions long before Woody came to be.  Unlike Mr. Hess, Woody inherited his billions, gained his various titles through nepotism, and whatever honors bestowed upon him through cronyism, the spoils of privilege.  He’s not much of a business man, so far as we can tell.  Let’s be frank.  Billions beget billions.  He’s not much of a family man either, so far as we can tell.  Johnson, when divorcing ex Sale Johnson, soon after purchasing the team, told reporters of the break up that he was looking forward to ‘spending more time with his team.’  It hasn’t worked out for the Johnson family or the team.

As you may or may not know, Woody’s eldest daughter, Casey Johnson, who once famously became embroiled in a public dispute with her own aunt over a paramour, died alone due to questionable circumstances at the age of 30.  She had been described in the press as a “reckless wildchild”, a “wayward heiress”, etc.  Tragedy strikes and is blind to bank accounts.  Do we feel bad about raising a spectre of questionability around Johnson’s personal life?  No.  And for that matter, the spectre was there long before we raised it.  He’s a public figure and is therefore subject to it, as was Joe Philbin, when his low life, rapist son drowned to death and Tony Dungy, whose son committed suicide, and we haven’t blinked once in criticizing those men, whether they were just absentee football lifer fathers, hypocrites (like Dungy, who perhaps was too wrapped up in Jesus and the scourge that is foul language to worry about his own son), or both.

http://www.tmz.com/2010/02/04/casey-johnson-death-diabetic-cause-of-death-coroner/

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2012/01/13/philbin-tragedy-ends-horror-show/

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/09/09/dungy-keeps-bashing-jets-but-will-that-bring-his-son-back-to-life/

Is it overly simplistic to blame an absentee, disinterested parent for his child’s lack of mental well being?  Is it?  You tell us.  In this case, we have discerned with Woody a pattern of failure, from his ownership of the team, to his marriage, to his family, and of course, his politics.  Woody, a staunch Republican, was heavily invested in both recent Bush campaigns, and also served as Mitt Romney’s New York campaign manager.  Do we have to ask how that went?  For all his billions, Johnson is a dimwitted loser.  Anyone with even remedial knowledge of politics knew that Romeny’s chances at claiming NY’s slice of the electoral pie were dead even before arrival.  On that bus, there are still plenty of great seats available.  What about the doomsday quotes from Woody about how he feared for America if Obama was re-elected?

“Well I think you always have to put country first,” Johnson said. “So I think it’s very, very important that for – not only us – but in particular for our kids and grandkids that this election come off with Mitt Romney and (Paul) Ryan as President and vice president.”

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/football/jets/pinch-woody-picks-mitt-jets-article-1.1172131#ixzz2HjECuhop

You know, America seems perfectly fine to me under Obama.  I haven’t really noticed the pervasive spread of socialism and am rather glad that the war mongering ways of Bush’s patrician fantasy world are for now past.  But I am not a billionaire being taxed at a rate I deem too high.  I’m just a Crackbillionair is all.  And if Woody was such a patriot, pardon the pun, why try to cheat his beloved US Gov’t out of a cool $100M in taxes?  That’s what he agreed to pay back the gov’t, plus interest, in 2001, but in actuality, law enforcement believes it to be a great deal more.

So many superrich Americans evade taxes using offshore accounts that law enforcement cannot control the growing misconduct, according to a Senate report that provides the most detailed look ever at high-level tax schemes.

Among the billionaires cited in the report are the owner of the New York Jets football team, Robert Wood Johnson IV; the producer of the “Mighty Morphin Power Rangers” children’s show, Haim Saban; and two Texas businessmen, Charles and Sam Wyly, who the Center for Public Integrity found in 2000 were the ninth-largest contributors to President Bush.

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/08/01/business/01tax.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0

When Woody bought the team, he had supposedly done so to impress his billionaire buddies.  He was gonna win the big game and then flash the big bling at Tavern on the Green.  How’s that working out so far?  You think his buddies are are impressed?  Do you think they were impressed when Mark Sanchez was found to be entertaining an underage girl at his home?  Or when Rex’s wife’s swinger profile hit on http://www.deadspin.com?

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/12/22/rex-ryans-wife-in-foot-fetish-videos/

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/12/23/michelle-ryan-a-k-a-ihaveprettyfeets-swinger-profile/

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2011/02/05/did-mark-sanchez-have-inappropriate-relationship-with-17-year-old-new-jersey-girl/

Woody was also gonna build that Jets’ mecca on the Westside, which, we’ll acknowledge would have elevated the Jets’ status from 2nd to 1st class citizens, which would’ve rebranded the team and provided Dallas Cowboy like revenue streams.  See, we think Woody cares way more about money than football and that the Jets’ Westside development project was what was really attractive to him, and not so much the Jets, despite the man’s obvious love of green Oxford ties.  We suspect little Bill knew as much, and is why he hastily tendered his resignation, scrawled on a napkin when Johnson took over (“I resign as HC of the NYJ”).

woodyweb2s-2-web

While no one doubts that Woody put a lot of energy into the Westside project at considerable costs, should we commend a man for spending $1B on a failure?  Instead, we’ll add it to the ever expanding list of Johnson failures–a failure from which the franchise has never recovered that has conscripted the team to permanent second class status by settling for another joint stadium.  Johnson blew that billion and has been penny wise and dollar foolish ever since.  Especially, his practice of forcing unwanted players and coaches on the organization.  Brett Favre, forced on Mangini, for the promotional value.  Disaster.  Mangini holdover Brian Schottenheimer, who when he was considered a hot coaching commodity, was given a big new contract by the Jets, forced on Rex Ryan.  Disaster.  Made Schottenheimer a media scapegoat and ruined his reputation.  Tebow, forced on Ryan.  Disaster.  Not our words either, or rather, ours and Special Teams Coordinator Mike Westhoff’s, who went on talk radio in Miami today to call the Tebow situation, among other things, “an absolute mess” and a “distraction” and said he doesn’t understand the rationale behind the acquisition and that he doesn’t think anyone does.

alg-woody-favre-jpgWoody Johnson with old man toy Brett Favre (above).

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/10/07/favre-perversions-exposed-in-detail-audio-and-penis-pics/

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/10/11/favre-also-hit-on-jets-team-masseuse-her-husband-calls-favre-fucking-scumbag/

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/10/22/favres-wife-ill-bang-the-bible/

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/10/26/favre-admitted-sterger-voicemails-to-nfl/

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2011/01/13/favres-sis-in-mississippi-meth-lab-bust/

http://espn.go.com/blog/afceast/post/_/id/53942/mike-westhoff-tebow-situation-a-mess

We though the new personnel guy was gonna be Tom Gamble for a minute, or Dave Caldwell.  Hoped it would be Giants’ executive Marc Ross, all guys the Jets have courted.  and by the Jets, we of course mean the outside consulting firm the Jets have hired to run their GM search, because despite Johnson owning his own near billion dollar football organization, he has not one reasonably knowledgeable football man trustworthy enough to make a solid hire.

Originally, the Jets hoped to have a hire in place by the time Rex and ihaveprettyfeet returned from their Bahamas jaunt, someone to begin to spin the stench off the joke, the perennial catastrophe that is the Jets, and to divert attention away from the fact that the Jets organization was so unprepared to face the media that they ignored their compulsory obligation to make the coach and owner available to the press within 7 days of their season’s end.

So last week it was the Caldwells and Gambles, and then this week they have supposedly interviewed six people in the last 2 days alone.  Including the Dolphins Assistant GM, who we’re certain is underqualified.  But a qualified GM would never accept preconditions on the job, such as the shot gun marriage with Rex which Johnson is forcing whomever the new fool to accept.

http://www.nydailynews.com/blogs/jets/2013/01/jets-expand-gm-search-will-interview-steelers-executive-omar-khan-and-dolphins-assistan

The expanded search, which now includes way more interviewees than what is a normal when replacing a GM for other teams, is representative of the fact that the Jets are grossly incompetent, clueless, and fucked.  I mean, who but the Jets, would have a hiring search that included Tom Heckert, the GM of a club that lost 40+ games in 3 years in Cleveland, or even worse, personnel people from the Montreal Alouettes of the CFL?  Now I don’t like Wes Welker at all, but when he said that shit about the Patriots “putting their best foot forward” against the Jets, ‘toe the line’ or whatever, we can’t blame him.  The Jets are a joke, continually perpetuated by their own organization, so how can anyone be angry when people joke about them?  In fact, we are pretty sure that the only reason that Belichik came down so hard on Welker was because he feared not doing so would provide the Jets extra motivation.  In short, he fined Welker in order to have a better shot at success in a football game.

The original title for this piece was to be, “NYJ: Woody Johnson, Billionaire Moron, Despicable Human Being, and Gross Incompetent, Should Sell the NYJ”.  But since all of that is dreadfully obvious, truths we hold self evident, we instead opted for a Welkerism.

Same old Jets?  We wish we could somehow return to such a comfortable level of incompetence, one we had come to accept.  Instead, we are mired in incompetence that we can only describe as mind boggling, prolific, and sublime.  After Dennis Byrd returned to Oklahoma, the Jets, as a kindness to their fans, should have disbanded, letting us all root for the Giants.

In loving memory of Dr. Jet.  Now if he would only stop haunting my house.

Crackbillionair (http://crackbilionair.wordpress.com)

We’ll be real right now, as we are wont to do.  We don’t despise Green Bay more than any other team that’s not a divisional opponent of the Jets, and nowhere near as much as Dallas, Oakland, Pittsburgh, Denver, Indy, or Washington.  Or Philadelphia, naturally.  We loved the whole Lombardi thing.  Books, documentaries, whatever.  (Brooklyn holler!)  We don’t wish to be too venomous in this space on this topic, so be advised that the opinion we are expressing is not meant to heap fresh scorn on Joe Philbin, Green Bay’s Offensive Coordinator, and it’s not like he’s sitting around reading us anyway.

But as we like to say, we have the right to say it, so we’re saying it.  It’s hard for us to mourn a kid who rapes little girls.  Frankly, we aren’t about to do it.  Nor can we mourn for a family that created an environment in which little girls get passed out drunk and then are sexually assaulted in the bed where the head of the household sleeps.  Yup.  Meet the Philbins, America.  Meet good old minor raping family USA and then figure out what is the proper way in which to regard them.

Was Michael Philbin Ben Roethlisberger Jr?  Yes, more or less.  Less the arm, more the convictions.  But here we have a football coach neglectful of his family, bordering on criminally so, and another football brat, bent on criminal sexual deviance.  Organized and calculated criminal sexual deviance.

We can’t say we read the Green Bay newspapers.  We aren’t one of the 10,000, so we didn’t know until the other day that this kid was a sex offender.  And don’t throw semantics at us.  That the judge for some reason didn’t make the kid register as a sex offender says more about the kid’s patrician status as the son of a Packer coach than it does about the truth.

Also, this wasn’t an isolated offense.  Two rapes, two sixteen year olds, two sentences.  This kid was a serial rapist.  As the families of the victims expressed, the class of the crime (misdemeanor) did not adequately portray the seriousness of the offenses.  Really, a little pedophilia is only tolerable in the fictional worlds spun by Tom Robbins, and otherwise, is no laughing matter.

When we heard that the Philbin kid was fished out of that lake cold, we assumed it was another dysfunctional football family, good from far, far from good, religious but not moral, and that an attention deprived kid took his life.

We could have a little bit of sympathy for that.  But not for a victim-ful crime family.  No understanding either.  Sex criminals and child abusers may get opportunities to rehabilitate themselves, but do they really, and really, who even cares anyway?  Would we have trusted our daughters around this kid because he had spent 4.5 months in jail?

Absolutely not.  And we can not trust his father either.  Again, we think only his patrician status stood between him and some sort of charge that he had endangered the welfare of a minor, what with the wild liquor and rape party going down in his home, the rapes between his sheets.

What of the tears shed by the Philbins at their son’s sentencing?  Tears of guilt?  Regret?  Contrition?  Responsibility?  Or of shame for their “good name”?  Or because their lad was off to the pen?

Spoke to Mr. White this morning.  He’s a Dolphin fan.  He said he was hoping Philbin became his next head coach.  Why not?  He’s obviously a very good football coach.  That really was never the problem.

Crack (https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com)

Jets’ coach Rex Ryan’s wife Michelle Ryan, or as we suspect, banned youtube member ihaveprettyfeet (above).

The indignity never ceases with the New York Jets.  Fresh off a stunning, season saving win over Pittsburgh in Pittsburgh, and what may have been a career saving win for the Jets’ 2nd year head coach, comes the news, along with video evidence that Rex’s wife may be a notorious foot fetish video internet poster, and more disturbing we guess, that it seems Rex has played camera man/off camera co-star to his pretty footed wife.

We wish we were making this up.  We prayed it was made up.  But upon seeing the video, we at least, have zero doubts.  And what’s worse?  Dolphins fans were first to the news reported by www.deadspin.com, adding insult to the injurious and pathetic loss to the Dolphags we suffered at home last week in which we dropped but could not score a touchdown.

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/08/05/favre-sent-pic-of-his-penis-to-former-jets-sideline-reporter/

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/10/22/favres-wife-ill-bang-the-bible/

See for yourself:

This May Or May Not Be Rex Ryan’s Wife Making Foot-Fetish Videos (UPDATE)

This May Or May Not Be Rex Ryan's Wife Making Foot-Fetish Videos (UPDATE)There’s a celebrity in the foot-fetish world who posts videos with titles like “Hot Mature Sexy Feet.” The videos feature a woman who looks like Jets coach Rex Ryan’s wife, Michelle — and, in one, a man offscreen who sounds like Rex.

A few years back, YouTube user “ihaveprettyfeet” — who shares a number of personal characteristics with Michelle, though we’ll get to that later — made a series of videos, apparently starring herself. In them, her feet, whether in stockings or shoes or simply bare, are always prominently displayed. An attractive older blonde, “ihaveprettyfeet” became hugely popular, to the point that when YouTube banned her account for terms of service violations, devotees took to message boards to wonder where she’d gone.

Her videos have been reposted by others on YouTube, and with so many followers, it was only a matter of time before one of them happened to be both a Jets fan and a Deadspin reader, too. We received a tip from one such person that “ihaveprettyfeet” was the spitting image of Michelle Ryan, wife of maybe the most popular coach in the NFL. “At least a twin sister,” the tipster said. Michelle Ryan doesn’t have a twin sister, but judge for yourself.

This May Or May Not Be Rex Ryan's Wife Making Foot-Fetish Videos (UPDATE)

We were told by one source that if this is Michelle Ryan, there’s no way Rex knows about it. But listen closely to the voice of the cameraman. Multiple viewers, including a YouTube commenter, have observed that it sounds an awful lot like Rex. Now, we’re not into feet or anything, but if that is indeed Michelle, and that is indeed Rex, well, more power to the both of them. Like many, many people out there, Rex is just in love with his wife’s feet. Shit, it’s almost romantic.

http://deadspin.com/5715741/this-may-or-may-not-be-rex-ryans-wife-making-foot+fetish-videos

So Tom Coughlin locks himself in a dark room for 2.5 hours after a bad loss and RexRyan goes off and makes some foot porn?  I’m gonna fuckin’ puke.  Deadspin goes on to say that ihaveprettyfeet toned down her internet act in mid 2009, around the time that the Jets’ were seriously considered making Ryan the head coach.  And the good folks at www.deadspin.com also have ihaveprettyfeet, then of Ellicott City, Maryland (Rex came from the Ravens), as a registered member of a swingers dating site.  Woody Johnson’s donating stacks to Mitt Romney; he is not going to enjoy the continued shenanigans one bit.

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/12/22/quote-of-the-week-tom-coughlin/

I need to throw up a few times and then plunge myself into great white shark infested waters.  If I survive, I’d respectly request a tractor or tank run me over.  I know it’s true.  Rex talks so much, I could tell his voice anywhere.  This is like Death and the Maiden for me when I heard Rex’s voice–I became Sigourney Weaver.

Don’t worry Jets fans.  Sure, it was hard to top getting trounced by the Pats 45-3 in terms of embarrassment, but of course, the Jets have limitless embarrassment potential. 

The fire Ryan/hire Gruden petition will be together soon, but in the meantime, I’ll be needing a grenade to stick in my mouth.  They dare bring more ridicule to this poor franchise.

I can’t abide.  She does have pretty feet for a 47 year old though!

Crack (https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com, www.crackbillionair.com)

New Jet defensive end Trevor Pryce (above).

In Jets’ coach Rex Ryan’s news conference after the Jets defeated the Miami Dolphins on Sunday Night Football America, 31-23, Ryan said he was happy with the win, but that the play of the defense ‘hurt his pride.’  The Jets gave up over 400 yards of total offense and over 350 yards passing to Dolphins quarterback Chad Henne.  That’s not to say the Jets have been awful on defense.  They have allowed only 47 points in 3 games for an average of 15.67 pts a game–a number they should be able to win with. 

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/09/09/dungy-keeps-bashing-jets-but-will-that-bring-his-son-back-to-life/

Still, the Jets have allowed 3 100 yard receivers against them in three games, and they aren’t getting to the quarterback all that much.  Enter Trevor Pryce, who led the Ravens in sacks last year with 6.5, and who is third in sacks amongst active players.  And let’s not forget that Pryce put up 13 sacks for Ryan in 2006 when Ryan still served as the Ravens’ Defensive Coordinator.  The Ravens released Pryce earlier in the week, despite Pryce being a starter for Baltimore at end.  Though the Ravens said they intended to re-sign Pryce, they never got the opportunity.  As soon as the Jets heard of his release, they pounced on Pryce, to the delight of Ryan and former Ravens Bart Scott and Jim Leonhard.

When asked if Pryce, a 14 year NFL veteran had any juice left, the loquacious linebacker replied that Pryce had “more juice than Tropicana.”  Scott also insinuated that several other Ravens must be jealous that Pryce found his way to the Jets. 

Pryce’s career stats:

 
Season Team   Tackles Interceptions Fumbles
G GS Comb Total Ast Sck SFTY PDef Int Yds Avg Lng TDs FF
2010 Baltimore Ravens 3 0 0 0 0 0.0 0 0.0 0
2009 Baltimore Ravens 16 7 31 19 12 6.5 0 0.0 1
2008 Baltimore Ravens 16 16 27 17 10 4.5 2 0.0 0
2007 Baltimore Ravens 5 2 15 9 6 2.0 0 0.0 0
2006 Baltimore Ravens 16 16 47 37 10 13.0 2 0.0 2
2005 Denver Broncos 16 16 33 31 2 4.0 3 0.0 1
2004 Denver Broncos 2 1 2 1 1 0.0 0 0.0 0
2003 Denver Broncos 16 16 36 28 8 8.5 1 0.0 2
2002 Denver Broncos 16 16 46 40 6 9.0 1 0.0 1
2001 Denver Broncos 16 16 39 33 6 7.0 4 0.0 1
2000 Denver Broncos 16 16 12.0 0 0 0.0 0
1999 Denver Broncos 15 15 13.0 1 0 1 0 0.0 0 0 0
1998 Denver Broncos 16 15 8.5 0 1 1 1.0 1 0 0
1997 Denver Broncos 8 3 2.0 0 0.0 0
TOTAL 276 215 61 1 13 1 1 0 8

http://www.nfl.com/players/trevorpryce/profile?id=PRY103822

Now let’s be real.  The Jets picked up a 35 year old pass rusher.  Again (recall Jason Taylor).  But Taylor, a former arch rival, has earned his wings with big hits on Tom Brady and Chad Henne in successive weeks.  Like Taylor, Pryce represents an upgrade at end opposite Sean Ellis.  Vernon Gholston, still looking like a bust from here, has yet to register an NFL sack, despite a few near misses.  The Jets are missing three prominent players on defense–their best player, Darrelle Revis, behemoth Kris Jenkins (out for the year, and possibly his career), and top pass rusher Calvin Pace.  Pryce brings a much needed boost to a squad that could have Revis and Pace back next week for the Vikings on Monday night football, or, the Jets could choose to sit both again, with the bye coming up after Minnesota, which would give the Jets a very healthy squad, hopefully, from then forward.

As for tomorrow in Buffalo, Pryce is definitely what the doctor ordered.  Pryce was given a playbook by the Jets upon arrival, but he doesn’t really need it because the Jets and Ravens run the same defense.  So much for Pryce taking his kids to Six Flags this weekend.  That was what he had planned, but when Ryan heard about the trip, he informed Pryce he would be in several pass rushing packages versus Buffalo. 

Great news.  an upgrade is an upgrade.  Too bad we’ll have to look at Drew Coleman in the starting lineup, who is perhaps the worst corner in the AFC East–but Pryce’s addition almost makes the Coleman thing acceptible.  I look for the Jets to notch a big win in Orchard Park tomorrow, and would like nothing more than to see Pryce contribute to the victory, which means pain for Bills’ new starting quarterback Ryan Fitzpatrick.

As for Kyle Wilson, who has struggled mightily, we are still very upset that the Jets did not use the 28th pick on Chiefs’ rising star Dexter McCluster.

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/03/27/why-the-jets-should-draft-dexter-mccluster-rb-ole-miss/

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/04/21/mayock-mccluster-best-value-pick-in-the-draft/

J-E-T-S!!!!!!!!

Crack (https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com, www.crackbillionair.com)

Jets’ star wide receiver Braylon Edwards (above), who caught a 67 yard touchdown last night which led to a 31-23 Jets victory against hated rival Miami.  But according to the commentators, from know-it-all windbag Mike Francesa to know-it-all windbags Tony Kornheiser and Chris Collinsworth, Edwards should never have played for the Jets last night, because at this stage of the game, they believe it falls upon the Jets shoulders to right all the wrongs in the world, and to bench players who they have brought here to help them win games–like last night’s.

This guy should not play this week.  Case closed.

–Mike Francesa, WFAN

And:

Admittedly, I’m on the outs with the Jets.

–Mike Francesa, WFAN

And:

If it was my team, I’d deactivate him.

–Chris Collinsworth, NBC Sports

A week after Edwards’ DWI, the pundits have no clearer understanding of one’s basic right to due process, and to the concept of innocent until proven guilty.  Francessa, Mr. Genius himself, spoke all week about Edwards and how the Jets needed to take a stand.  He also talked all week about how the Ravens were going to cover the spread against the Browns.  They did not.  He also comes off his dubious prediction that the Colts would “blow out” New Orleans in the Superbowl. 

But Francesa, who hates the Jets, can’t really be expected to think any differently.  He alienated himself with the team so badly that no Jets’ players or upper management figures will come on the air with him.  And last week, when Jets’ fans called in to voice their support for Edwards being in the lineup last night, Francesa blew up.  One caller asked Francesa if Shaun Ellis played for Mangini–the ultra moral head coach–the week he got arrested for possession of cannabis.  The fat man said “I don’t remember” and hung up.

How professional is it to be a big time sports personality in New York who can’t get along with a team in New York, whom that personality depends on for interviews?  And what about Francesa’s good buddy Bill Parcells?  Yeah, they’re also on the outs, and no longer speak.  Maybe it’s because Mike speaks so poorly, from such an uninformed bully pulpit.  Maybe that’s why the much smaller ticket duo of Benigno and Roberts had Jerrico Cotchery on with them after Edwards’ arrest which followed a night at a Cotchery charity event in Manhattan, while Francesa could only score beat writers to talk Jets on his nationally syndicated radio and television show.

The closest Francesa got to interviewing a Jet last week was when he had on Dolphins’ head coach Tony Sparano–the coach of the Jet’s opponent last night.  While 1050 ESPN radio pulled a number of high profile Jets’ related interviews, Francesa was kissing Bucs’ coach Rahim Morris’ ass.

So we pulled for you a post from WhiteShoeWillie of www.theganggreen.com that clearly shows that no players arrested for similar infractions were suspended by their teams in recent memory.  Have a look:

 09-23-2010, 10:27 PM

  #1
Rookie
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Beavis Island
Posts: 15,675
vCash: 3500

Default For those of you who think Braylon should be Benched/Suspended/Cut by Jets …

This is the list of all NFL players who were arrested for DUI related offenses since 01/01/09. Please point out the player who was punished with loss of playing time by their own team because of a DUI/DWI without killing someone. Thank you.
Code:
9/21/2010	Braylon Edwards 	N.Y. Jets	WR	Arrested on suspicion of drunken driving around 5:15 a.m. in New York. Blood-alcohol content reportedly 0.16.
9/3/2010	Fili Moala 		Indianapolis	DT	Arrested, charged with drunken driving, speeding, after being stopped at 2:30 a.m. Blood-alcohol content measured 0.15.
8/8/2010	Gerard Lawson 		Cleveland	DB	Arrested, charged with DUI after hitting parked car. Sheriff deputies said he left scene of accident.	Pleaded no contest in plea deal. Received punishment of 20 hours of community service, one year probation, 72 hours of "alternative to jail program," six months suspended license.
7/3/2010	Quinton Ganther 	Seattle		RB	Arrested on suspicion of DUI in Sacramento.
7/1/2010	Chris Simms 		Tennessee	QB	Arrested, charged with driving while intoxicated with marijuana in New York.
6/13/2010	Ray McDonald 		San Francisco	DL	Arrested on suspicion of DUI in San Mateo County. He reportedly was driving 94 mph in 65-mph zone.
3/27/2010	Joey Porter 		Arizona		LB	Arrested on suspicion of DUI in Bakersfield. Also accused of assaulting police officer and resisting arrest.	Dropped for lack of evidence.
3/19/2010	Ronnie Brown 		Miami		RB	Arrested on suspicion of DUI near Atlanta after being pulled over for changing lanes without signaling. Blood-alcohol content of .158.
3/13/2010	Spencer Havner 		Green Bay	TE	Arrested in California on suspicion of DUI after motorcycle accident around 2:45 a.m.
2/20/2010	Will Allen 		Miami		CB	Arrested, charged with DUI about 3:30 a.m. in Miami Beach. Breath tests showed blood-alcohol content at .152 and .167.
2/19/2010	Byron Westbrook 	Washington	CB	Arrested on suspicion of DUI just before 2 a.m. in Maryland.	Acquitted.
1/29/2010	Rey Maualuga 		Cincinnati	LB	Arrested on DUI charge in Kentucky after hitting a parking meter and two parked cars with his 2003 Pontiac.	Pleaded guilty, blood-alcohol-content of .157, suspended sentence of seven days in jail, $350 in fines, two years probation, fined two game checks by NFL.
1/1/2010	Taj Smith 		Indianapolis	WR	Arrested on suspicion of DUI after being pulled over at 3:24 a.m.
12/29/2009	Bobby McCray 		New Orleans	DE	Arrested on DUI charge, speeding, no registration, at 4:30 a.m.
11/16/2009	Eric Weems 		Atlanta		WR	Arrested, charged with DUI in DeKalb County, Georgia.
10/27/2009	Marcus Johnson 		Tampa Bay	OL	Arrested on suspicion of DUI. Police found him asleep in 2010 Chevy Impala about 4 a.m.	Team cut him same day.
8/30/2009	Cedric Griffin 		Minnesota	CB	Arrested, charged with DUI.	Pleaded guilty, paid $300 fine, two days of community service.
8/21/2009	Chris Davis 		Tennessee	WR	Arrested, charged with DUI in Nashville after 2 a.m. traffic stop.
6/20/2009	Owen Schmitt 		Seattle		FB	Arrested for investigation of drunken driving near Seattle.	Pleaded guilty to reckless driving, 24 hours of community service and payment of $2,130.
4/5/2009	Leon Hall 		Cincinnati	CB	Charged with DUI after being pulled over at 3:11 a.m. Blood-alcohol level of 0.149, according to breath test.	Pleaded guilty to misdemeanor reckless driving, sentenced to 64 hours community service, three days in a residential driver intervention program, $250 fine.
4/1/2009	Donte Stallworth	Cleveland	WR	Charged with DUI manslaughter for March 14 incident in which he struck and killed a pedestrian in Miami. Blood-alcohol level was .126.	Pleaded guilty, 30 days in jail, lifetime driver's license suspension,1,000 hours of community service. NFL suspended him indefinitely.
3/13/2009	David Macklin 		Kansas City	CB	Arrested on drunken-driving charge in Newport News, Va.
2/27/2009	Reggie Williams 	Jacksonville	WR	Arrested during traffic stop in Houston, charged with drunken driving and marijuana possession.	Dropped. Blood-alcohol content was .05, below the legal limit.
2/1/2009	Jamal Williams 		Chargers	DT	Arrested on suspicion of DUI after being pulled over for speeding in Bentley.	Reduced to reckless driving charge after blood-alcohol content was 0.07.
1/6/2009	Vincent Jackson 	Chargers	WR	Arrested on suspicion of DUI around 2:30 a.m. in 2008 GMC Sierra.	Four days in work-release program, five years probation, $2,408 fine, 15 days community service.

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/09/22/jet-offender-edwards-to-play-sunday-night-at-miami/

https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com/2010/09/09/dungy-keeps-bashing-jets-but-will-that-bring-his-son-back-to-life/

Mike says the Giants would never have played Edwards.  Well Mike, Antrell Rolle of the Giants recently blasted their head coach, lack of cohesiveness, and approach to games, after the Giants ponied up $ 37.5 M to obtain his services.  And he played yesterday–in a 29-10 blowout loss at home.  But then again, Mike is a Giants’ fan, and a Jet hater.

Is Edwards a dick, Mike?  You bet he is.  Is he a danger to society.  Most obviously.  But the Jets didn’t make him that way and there’s nothing they can do to change these facts.  Edwards has been a privileged, pampered athlete since he was in junior high school.  How has he gotten away with it, you ask?  Because he scores touchdowns.  Thank God the Jets were smart enough to know they have no control over Edwards, and didn’t concede to ill-informed public pressure and sit the guy at the expense of their team and their fans.  When the league doles out it’s laughable punishment, after the case is adjudicated, we’ll be happy to abide by it.

The result in the meantime?  Jets win.

When fat Mike owns his own team, we’ll see how hard he’ll be when it comes to sitting a player at the expense of a win, in a 16 game regular season.  I mean, did Francesa kill Pettite or A-Rod or any of the other Yanks on steroids?  Of course he didn’t.  But Mike wears quadruple XL Yankees pajamas to bed.

Actually Mike, the case is not closed.  It’s in fact, very open.  And BTW Mike, it’s Tony Sparano (Spuh-RANO) not Tony Soprano.  What a moron!   Our sincere thanks to WSW of TGG.com.  And for anyone wondering, Shaun Ellis played, like Edwards, and the rest of that list above, despite their arrests.

J-E-T-S!!!!!!!!!!! 

Crack (https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com, www.crackbillionair.com)

                                                         Dez Bryant, below, doing his thing.

Dez is now a Cowboy, and word has leaked through the Dallas media that the Dolphins, in pre-draft interviews, and specifically Dolphin GM Jeff Ireland, asked Bryant if his mom was a prostitute.  It is no secret that Bryant has had many issues to deal with, and comes into the league as one of the most, if not the most enigmatic talent in the draft.  Many scouts have whispered that Bryant has a low compete level, that he doesn’t run routes fully, or sell routes, and that he quit on his workout at his pro day.  On Dez’s mom:

In an article last week in The Dallas Morning News, Jean-Jacques Taylor reported that Bryant’s mother, Angela, gave birth to him at age 15. She sold drugs to provide for her kids. But the two are close. Angela celebrated with her son at a party this past Thursday when the Cowboys moved up to select Dez in the first round.

http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/dn/latestnews/stories/042810dnspobryantmomHP.29cb3cb.html

Teams have the right to ask these kids whatever they want, whether it is in bad taste or not.  They have to decide whether to pay these kids millions of dollars, a scary investment.  Whether Bryant’s mom was a prostitute or not is a fact that the Dolphins and the league probably already knew.  For a kid with an iffy background, the question was probably asked in order to probe Bryant’s constitution.  Bryant handled the question in stride.  Recently he spoke at length to reporters about his mom.

…his mom, Angela, who had him at the young age of 15 and later came out as lesbian. Bryant, who grew up in a conservative town of about 32,000 located in the heart of the Bible Belt in a small Texas town, says he has become “comfortable” with his mother’s “change in sexual orientation” – but he still has issues about it, reports the Advocate.

“I didn’t like it. Really, I still don’t,” he said. “I dealt with it and now I’m comfortable with it.”

Angela Bryant said she was honest with him early on because they have no secrets in their relationship.

http://www.shewired.com/Article.cfm?ID=24850

Ireland issued an apology after he found himself in a hail storm of criticism over the prostitute question.

“My job is to find out as much information as possible about a player that I’m consider drafting. Sometimes that leads to asking in-depth questions.”  Having said that, I talked to Dez Bryant and told him I used poor judgment in one of the questions I asked him. I certainly meant no disrespect and apologized to him.”  I appreciate his acceptance of that apology and I told him I wished him well as he embarks on his NFL career.”

http://sports.yahoo.com/nfl/blog/shutdown_corner/post/Dolphins-GM-apologizes-for-asking-player-if-mom-?urn=nfl,237104

Our resident Dolphin expert, Mr. White, would probably tell us that the Dolphins organization, who he termed “vanilla”, would probably never draft a player like Bryant because of his baggage.  So then why even ask the kid this type of question?  Did Ireland really mean the kid “no disrespect”?  Far be it from us to judge, but it seems mean spirited and sadistic.  While we don’t root for Cowboys around here, we do root for them against Miami. 

Hopefully Dez doesn’t forget the question whenever the Cowboys and Dolphins play.

–Crack (https://crackbillionair.wordpress.com)

 Jared Odrick, the Dolphins 1st round choice, at the Rose Bowl this January.

Hello to all of Crack’s loyal readers, allow myself to introduce……myself; Mr. White’s the name and I have been given the opportunity to borrow Crack’s blog to file a report from the 6th burrough (Miami).  Let me begin by first thanking Crack and Dr. Jet for being magnanimous and allowing a Dolphin fan the chance to wax philosophical about the Dolphin’s draft.  I am sure they would extend the opportunity to supporters of the Pats and Bills, we just don’t know any.

Anyway, the most glaring impression I got after pouring over what must have been countless man hours scouting, researching and doing their due diligence to pick the right group of men to lead the Dolphins into this new era is that Jeff Ireland, Tony Sparano and Bill Parcells must love vanilla ice cream.  Actually, I pictured the scene in my head, Jeff and Tony, looking through the glass freezer at the multitude of flavors, tastes and combinations and saying “Ehhh, I’ll just have a scoop of vanilla…in a cup.”  That about sums up the Dolphin’s draft.  By no means does that mean I am disappointed, we have many holes to fill, not to mention the fact that we just need depth at about every position.  The Dolphins’ brain trust were determined to recoup the second round pick that was sent to Denver in the Brandon Marshall trade and when C.J. Spiller went to Buffalo (according to most, the only 1st round talent the Dolphin’s really lusted for) it was all but a certainty.  As an aside, the NFL draft, in prime-time drew 45 million viewers; to put that in perspective 3 times as many people watched Ndamakong Suh in a 3-piece suit hug Rusty Goddell than watched Lebron James in a playoff game.  Seems like whenever we bash the NFL for its hubris, the ratings prove us wrong.  Anyway, the Dolphin’s most glaring holes were on defense, namely the defensive line which got no pressure last year and the free-safety spot, which allowed every tight-end they faced free reign of the middle of the field.  Six of the seven Dolphins draft picks were spent on the defensive side of the ball, the lone exception being John Jerry, a tackle from Ole Miss that the fins are converting to guard to take the spot of the now untradeable Justin Smiley.  The first round pick of Jared Odrick was curious, because the most glaring hole on the line was at nose tackle, and there was a legitimate NT available in Tennessee tackle Dan Williams, who was gone by the time we picked at 28, but was available at 12, as well as safety Earl Thomas (1 of Mike Mayock’s 2 favorites in this draft) if, and I’ll go out on a limb and say when, 1 or both become pro-bowlers we will be reminded of what could have been in the same way we did when Dave Wanstache chose Eddie Moore over Anquan Boldin (not that I’m bitter).  Jeff Ireland was able to couch any negative sentiment with the earth shattering news that we have solved our Nose Tackle issues from within.  How, do you ask, did Jason Ferguson’s suspension for performance enhancing substances (for a NT, what’s that a KFC double down?) rescinded?  No, they have decided that our nt for 2010 will be defensive end Randy Starks.  So, rather than draft a true stud tackle from an SEC powerhouse, we’d draft a guy at the only position we have any depth at and move one of our most effective ends from last season inside; and then act like it was the plan all along.  Super.  Otherwise we chose “high-character”,  4 year starters from big schools that the brain trust had experience coaching at the senior bowl, an opportunity the Dolphins brass leapt at.  At this point it may sound like I’m bitching, but I’m really not.  We got, in my estimation, 3 starters in Odrick, LB Koa Misi and the aforementioned Jerry.  Looking at the later picks and I’m pretty confident that they also got a good value pick in Georgia safety Reshad Jones (most draftniks had him graded as a 2nd/3rd rd pick) which they traded up in the fifth round to grab and OLB Austin Spitler, an athletic freak who had the misfortune of being behind John Laurinatis for 3 years.  Pressed to give a letter grade (which eerily reminds me of my day job) I’ll give the Dolphins a solid B (I rarely do plus/minus).  It was a safe, sound draft full of solid football players, however in a league where the offensive brilliance of New Orleans and Indianapolis ruled the postseason; and where all of their division rivals added playmakers the Dolphins played it safe.  Maybe last year’s reach for Pat White had them scared, or the Marshall trade is all the risk this group can muster… but would it be too much to ask for a little syrup or some sprinkles in my cup?
Till next time
Mr White